I miss you Dad. Happy Father’s Day.
A Rhyme for the Ancient Miltoner[JK1]
Twas on the streets that round Beantown[JK2]
From Dot to Mattapan,
That I found up-propped in a coffee shop
An elderly Milton man.
His coat was seedy, his tie was “wrong[JK3] ”
Yet neatly-nice was he,
And I heard this mate pontificate
In a sermonizing key:
“Oh, I am a husband and father-bold[JK4] ,
And, the best local handyman
And a tour-guide bright, a dishwasher delight
And patriarch of the Kelley Clan”
He pointed middle-finger and loosened his tooth[JK5] ,
Till I really felt afraid,
For I couldn’t help thinking, the man had
Stopped drinking,
And so I simply said;
“O, elderly man it is little I know
Of the duties of men such as thee,
But I’ll eat my hand if I understand,
How you can possibly be
At once a husband and father-bold,
And, the best local handyman
And a tour-guide bright, a dishwasher delight
And patriarch of the Kelley Clan”
Then he gave a drum to his fingers, which is[JK6]
A trick for the bathroom sink,
With the look of a rogue and in his best Irish brogue,
He sang this tune with a wink:
“Twas in the good town Lower Mills[JK7]
That the Kelleys really came to be,
And on River Street, three kids did bleat,
Kinky, Joey, and Fremmy
Began I as a husband and father-bold,
And, the best local handyman
And a tour-guide bright, a dishwasher delight
And patriarch of the Kelley Clan
A vet’ran thrice and hero once[JK8]
A shoulder filled with lead
A tiny plot, a Buick in the lot
Ideal for the Boston bred.
And pretty nigh, all my world was filled,
With wives, brothers, mothers and friends,
A world not posh, but with driveways to wash[JK9]
And broken things to mend
Thus, local rounds became the norm,
For guests from far and near.
Castle Island heights to city lights[JK10] ,
The ‘story I made clear.
But times grew tough in Mattapan,
And Kelleys had to shove[JK11] .
We took the pill and found the hill
Still close to those I love.
On Morton Road the kids sprung up,
And to cruising I did take[JK12] .
There could be found, no ship around,
Whose tonnage I could not make.
And soon enough new urchins arrived,
Away from the olde stomping ground.
New eyes to see what’s important to me[JK13]
New homes to ensure were sound.
Some of those “new eyes”
And, whenever in need of either wittles or drink,
And a-hungry I did feel,
Dunkin’s sweets or Panera treats-
Coffee with my pals ‘twas the best meal.
Today, as before, I spend long days
Fulfilling all others’ wishes[JK14] .
Nine decades now of speeding the plow,
Ninety years of doing the dishes.
And I always laugh, and I never complain[JK15]
(about these things anyway…)
But I sit and croak, and with a single choke
I have with pride to say:
‘Oh, I am a husband and father-bold,
And, the best local handyman
And a tour-guide bright, a dishwasher delight
And patriarch of the Kelley Clan’”
JJK 2/14/09 Revised 2/14/19
[JK1]The poem is a parody of the poem The Yarn of the Nancy Bell by William S. Gilbert which is similar to The Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Taylor Coleridge.
[JK2]Dot = Dorchester. Though the shops have changed, Dad loved his morning coffee and paper ritual.
[JK3]Dad was a bit of a “neat-freak”. When he went to work in the mornings his suits were always cleaned and pressed. He always looked put-together. However, his ties, particularly in the 70s, could be garish. Everything had a military orderliness. Shoes were always shined and lined up evenly in his closet. Ties and belts always hung at the same height etc. He would call this “neatly-nicing” everything. Clothes that were worn out were called “seedy”.
And… boy did he like to give a lecture!
[JK4]Dad liked to (attempt to) fix everything and help everyone around do the same. One of his favorite things to do was to show people from out of town his city-which he knew inside and out. Always willing to lend a hand, he would always help clean up after a party or dinner-usually doing the dishes.
When I originally wrote this 10 years ago, “Patriach of the Kelley Clan” meant his own family. Surviving the ensuing 10 years, he has inherited the title for the larger family.
[JK5]While most people use their index fingers to point, Dad had the habit of pointing with his middle-finger. It drove Mom nuts.
When he got a dental bridge, he liked to pop it out and mug for people showing both the device and the gap in his teeth.
20 or 30 years ago he stopped drinking and we would often give him a hard time by saying he was “more fun” when he drank.
[JK6]While shaving in the sink or cleaning up, Dad would drum a march or military tune with his fingers on the the sink in front of him. It would ring down the pipes and through out the house- again, driving Mom nuts.
Dad taunted the grand-kids with “you’re a rogue!” to which they would giggle with delight. He also put on the brogue many a time.
[JK7]Lower Mills was ground-zero. I’ve lost count as to how many houses he lived in.
280 River Street was his own first home. A side by side duplex that he split with Uncle Billy and Nana (Mabel) Kelley
Kinky – Chris; Joey – John, Fremmy – Marianne (a corruption of “very-best-friend’)
[JK8]With his self-mocking bravado, he would declare himself a 3-time vet for being a merchant marine at the tail end of WWII, a paratrooper with the 82nd airborne between the wars, and finally as an infantryman after having been drafted to the Korean War.
He would proclaim his “hero” status for having earned the Purple Heart after having been shot in 1951 (the shoulder filled with lead)
Dad loved Buicks and they would be his cars of choice for many years.
[JK9]Well before the leaf-blower (and for some time thereafter) Dad used the garden hose as his tool of choice to clean driveway of debris from the trees.
[JK10]On his tours of the city, Castle Island was a mandatory stop. He knew the history of the city like no other.
[JK11]Crime and the upheaval from forced busing eventually caused us to move. It was
all of one mile away-Milton Hill, but outside of the city proper.
[JK12]Dad loved ships which was part of the reason he loved Castle Island where he could watch them come and go. As his kids grew up and out, his trip of choice became the cruise.
[JK13]The grandkids grew up in the suburbs. Dad would spend his days cleaning up their yards and houses-but mostly to spend time with them.
He loved taking the grandkids out to Panera or Dunkin’ donuts where all of them could satisfy their sweet tooth(s)
[JK14]While at 90 his ability to help others is limited, his desire to has never waned.
[JK15]OK… artistic license…
